Thursday, December 18, 2008

B is for Bitch

I have not been on my best behavior lately. My world is full of people to whom I owe apologies. I also have a list of valid excuses. The thing is that I have had excuses to be bitchy for decades and yet somehow managed to avoid pissing off everyone who crossed my path. Years of being surrounded by idiots has worn me out & I'm just not that good at pretending any more. These are the people I have yelled at this week:

1) The idiot at Wendy's drive up. Here's my take on drive up - it's not fricken rocket science. One plain HAMburger, a SMALL fry and a small DIET. Take it off the warming rack. Put it in a bag. India graduates engineers by the thousands and we can't fill a drive-up order right. Notice my son sitting in the passenger seat. He's hiding his face in his hands and trying to look small.

2) The property manager at my building, for having 6 weeks to fit up my studio and not having a dead bolt installed on the door before we moved in. Our building is burglar friendly. The man is a friend of mine, but that does not stop me from reaming him a new one. After I'm done, I burst into tears. Fricken hysteric.

3) The idiots at Comcast. Three weeks after my cable install was scheduled & I still don't have cable. Ten (TEN!) phone calls later, I still don't have cable. Now that I've blasted everyone who could possibly make cable happen, how do you rate my chances of getting online in 2008?

4) My bisque suppliers. This is how it works. I place an order. You deliver it. I only order stuff I need. If I didn't need it, I wouldn't order it. So when I order three pints of black paint, it is not because I actually need LIME GREEN paint. And when you tell me you're sorry but you're really busy, I Don't Want To Hear It. I want black paint. Now. When I screw up, I jump through hoops to fix it, even if it costs me money. Send someone to the UPS store with 3 pints of black paint. Now.

Next week is Christmas and I'm feeling more charitable. I'll be more gentle with the next the Wendy's gal - the offender has most likely moved on to Taco Bell. I'll call Eric and tell him not to rush on the lock - I don't really have any thing of value in here anyway. I'll call my supplier and thank them for the Lizard Lime - black is just so over rated. Then finally, I'll tell Comcast to take their time -wandering around the halls searching for an unsecured wireless signal is almost as good as hitting the web button on my keyboard.


Miss Thystle said...

Sometimes a kick in the bootay is what gets things moving. Especially at the cable company. Make sure to double check your bill they'll probably try to charge you for those days too! On a happier note gianna's present arrived and is so so cute. I'm meeting her mommy for lunch today and I just know she will love it! It was super sweet of you and totally cancels out the bad karma you may have aquired for yelling at the drive thru kid!

Debbie said...

Sometimes you just gotta get all this frustration out. Who wouldn't be upset at such incompetence?

kwr221 said...

Oh, I'd be a total bitch, too.

Sometimes you just have to let it out.

Lorrie Veasey said...

ooooo remind me not to evah get on your bad side.

Sheree said...

I just want you to know that I've turned over a new leaf. Mended my ways. Found Jesus. I'm not going to yell at people any more. Evah.

Oh, what a load of crap. I seem to be comfortable enough in my Cronehood to say exACTly what's on my mind.

word verification: luria
definition: a style of blogging that includes intimiate posts about our nether regions.
sentence: Lorrie's comments on Krag's colowr bordered on luria.

sheila said...

I hear ya. I seem to ALWAYS get a fast food worker to completely fuck up a SIMPLE order. Always. Sometimes over and over on the same visit. I go balistic. That's just who I am I guess.

We had direct tv scheduled between 2 and 4. He showed up at 8PM. 2 months later I needed to get another tech and it turns out, the first guy left exposed frayed wires which (duh) caused bad reception. Incompetance. No one gives good customer service anymore. Except maybe YOU and ME (I own a sm bus also)


The wife and I went into the comcast office to get a receiver for our new t.v. the other day. The guy behind the counter said, "You have two accounts. One for internet and one for cable, Should I just combine them? It will be cheaper for you."
"Sure!" we said.
The other day we got two bills. One was a late fee for a bill we should no longer of had (which we paid while we were there so we could make our lives easier.)
I don't get it. On the other hand we cancelled HBO a year ago and they just turned it off a month ago.
The Hafugman came out of the woods surly and mean, still they gave be hugs to the all small wiry half men.

Sheree said...

So the day of this post, I got an email from a gal who works at Comcast. Seems she read my blog & offered to step in and get things moving. And I thought I had no readers...

My rant must have worked, because before I could take her up on her offer, a cable guy showed up. I now have internet. No TV or phone, but I'm am so hooked up to the web. Whoo hoo!

Customer.Connect.Melissa said...

Hi All!

I'm the gal from Comcast that OOAB references in her follow up post. If there is anything our team can do to assist you with Comcast services or products, please feel free to email our team at We're here if you need us.

Kind Regards,
Melissa Mendoza
Comcast Customer Connect
National Customer Operations